Three rubbings i did from an observed gravestone. I had planned to use them to make blinkers for a horse, but that disin't work.

 Again from a gravestone. LIked the expression. It started out as an angel but i used frantic marks nad harch lines to subvert it.

 My impression of eel marsh house. I liked this image and used it in the final piece. It was developed from other bits of houses and buildings i had drawn from observation.

 Look carefully and you'll see the fingers of this impression of a sea fret- a cloud that is thick, rises like fog but from the sea, and enveloped mr kipps, clutching at him according to the narrative.

Some developments of the rubbing; i would use them as nathaniel. more later

work

woman in balck things are following.

I did not like this project, as i did not like the story at all, but i suppose one might say that it was good practice for doing things i don't want to, or other such moral. However i am inclined to just not do things that cause me psychological grief and stress. On the course, i probably will, to jumpt through hoops and pass, but in the outside world...no.
    i was also on my own during this project, which was interesting. I quite enjoyed being able to plan where and when i should go location drawing, and i felt i got a lot done during the week, more than i would've had i been in uni, i think. The week was tough, as i had to find time to fulfill important family responsibilities, and be out with family friends visiting the city, as well as do all the drawing, researching and reading (i listened to the story, had no time for the book). The whole rreason i couldn't go on the trip away was becasue i knew i'd have to do al these things, so overall the week was very, very very stressful.
   Doing the final pieces was a  little tricky, mostly because i think there's a stigma attached to the term 'final piece' that drives me to overthink and not work as freely.
      the final piececs i selected are all much much better in my sketchbook, and when the time came to put up the exhibition, i couldn't be bothered enough to make them look better: i was very ill nad at my wits end with the project. That being that, i'm quite proud of what i managed to acheive, through all the obstacles.

I've only just learned that thins blog was supposed to be a show of my work! That makes a little more sense now. Will try to do it more regularly.

odour woes...

First of all, I'd like to explain that for the last  (let's see, how old am I....) 19 years (or slightly less) i have been pretty much nose-deaf. Or nose-blind. I'm not sure what top call it, but I haven't been able to smell. This has ben GREAT, cos I could still smell things like chocolate cake, or chicken tikka, but couldn't smell farts, deodorant or other such things that are nasty. I took pleasure in buying perfume, for the pretty little bottles, as I found all the scents similarly weak and attractive.
    
 I DID NOT REALISE HOW FORTUNATE I WAS.

Now, for some reason, my sense of smell has been reawakened. My life has become HELL. U'm going to have to continue this later...i have a workshop starting in cinco minutes.

First Fortnight. Thoughts.

This has been very intersting. It's ben a LOT of work, so far...I've worked with a team, twice, and I've just begun to do independant work, which to me is a lot more palatable. Probably I just haven't met the right team yet ;) That having been said, I enjoyed the challenge of working with a team. It involved a lot of compromise, and the song was not entirely to my liking, but overall it was good. I got a lot out of it, and I had fun making my bat puppets. (I'll post pictures later.)
    Lectures:
      Tuesday: didn't know there was one! Thought it was just a film, which of course i can catch up on, seeing as i can never stay till 7 on tuesdays, having un-movable prior commitments. But i've just found out there's a lecture before the film, so next tuesday i plan to stay for that then leave and catch up on the film another time.
      Wednesday: I SHOULD say these have been useful, you know, for life and stuff.... but to be perfectly honest they've so far proved to be the biggest waste of my time so far. I hate to say that, as I know they are indeed 'importnat' becasue they're about practitioners' actual lives and i will of course need to know these very practical things at one time, but still.
     So far, teh first week was mediocre, i was uninterested but it was tolerable. The second week i was dead bored out my tiny mind, my back ached beyond measure and i was put hours behind on my work, all from listening to this man go ON about his work. I wasn't going to go, as i had so much work to do, but i decided last minute that i should; it might change my life or something...Needless to say, i was exceedingly mad that i'd made the 'responsible' decision and gone to it. This week, yesterday, again i wasn't going to go- i had piles of work to do and my reflective journal, which has been a casualty of my mad timetable, BUT I DID trek the hour and a half to college only to be told it was cancelled. There's no one to blame for that, i didn't particularly mind as i was basically joyful I didn't have to go, and could get on with my work all the sooner. The problem was that if he had been there, i would have been as miserable as in the previous weeks- it being yet another designer, this time in advertising, which may have been better than the previous, but was still not my thing at all. WHEN WILL THERE BE ILLUSTRATORS???? i need to find out who's going to be on...it's not worth the time and trek if it's going to be nothing of interest or importance.
     Thursday: I live for thursdays. The lectures are FANTASTIC and i love them. I wouldn't miss one even if i were in new zealand teh night before. I'd take out a loan and jump on a plane.

My workload:  is too much given my travelling time, tbh. I will need to sort out my timetable this weekend, cos this is mad. I'm managing, barely....
         ....it's not the work, it's the travel. It's the people on the travel. I hate it. I've had to muster up courage to leave the house today, after the experience i had yesterday nearly drove my to agoraphobia.
                                     I've never really been a tv watcher- i watch it but i prefer books. All my favourite shows (all two of them) i watch on dvd. Yet recently i've begun to understand. I love tv. it makes human interaction possible without actually having to interact with humans. don't have to touch them. don't have to put up with their nastiness in any of its forms. can switch them off at will.  :)
      you need never leave home. I would like to never leave home, until i have a nice big country house in the middle of nowhere and a lake, on my own with three sheep.
      
                     That's all i need.
    

Curiouser and curiouser: English illustrators, designers and artists

...from the wonderful place I call home:

1. From 'The Highwayman', illustrated by by Charles Keeping
      I was literally raised on this dark poem, and I've always had a special place in my heart for it and its brilliant illustrations. I love the dramatic elegance of Keeping's inky style; how it so vividly portrays emotion and movement without using any colour- which i can link to my own work, I often just draw in black and white, although it's usually because I get really proud of a drawing and can't bear to colour it in, rather than because I've mastered the technical wizardry of the medium. (Far from it. :) )

http://mashadutoit.wordpress.com/2008/05/19/a-darker-keeping-the-highwayman/

2. 'Visions of the daughters of Albion' by William Blake
      I appreciate illustrations with meaning, and you don't get more meanigful than William Blake. This illustration has many meanings- all the characters represent something, with the overall theme of the painting being the innocence and political freedom of early North America, and the longing jealousy of the 'monarchy-opressed' Britain it sprang from. This is also relevant to me because I am half American and have an interest in early american history (well, the history of the Native americans, to be precise). I also like how he's drawn Theotormon (on the right) tying himself in knots over his moral dilemma- it's a really interesting visual interpretation of the metaphor.

http://www.tate.org.uk/learning/worksinfocus/blake/imagin/cast_06.html

3. Arthur Rackham
     I couldn't find the name of this work online, but I've always loved it particularly out of Rackham's work, since I found it in a book at school. I adore Rackham's style; i find it very inspiring as i am fascinated with fairy tales and his grim(m) yet homely style welcomes me. I really like the sinewy look of the tree and how that relates to the softness of the girl. This has special meaning to me because i also talk to trees. ;) I love trees, they tell me stories as they rock me.

http://marymcandrew.com/coffee-stain-moth-and-arthur-rackham/

4. Alan Aldridge 'Who Killed Cock Robin?'
     Last year i went to the Museum of everything in Primrose Hill, and was duly fascinated by some scenes by a taxidermist who had created what was almost like 3d illustration, illustrating stories using stuffed animals arranged in specific tableaux within glass frames. I forgot who the artist was, but this image reminds me of it. I find it visually stimulating, and very interesting as there is so much to look at...which is true of all Aldridge's work.

 http://catbirdcraft.blogspot.com/2011/01/artists-that-inspire-us.html

   

5. Tom Eckersley
      My favourite book as an infant was Percy Short and Cuthbert, which was about the adventures of a very small hippo and a giant pelican. For that reason I've always loved pelicans and wanted to climb into their ginormous beaks. :) This just reminds me of that, although the thing about banks (which is why he done it) is dull to the extreme.
http://www.vads.ac.uk/large.php?uid=115774

6. Frank Newbould- Skegness
    I am very inspired by the art deco style that is reflected in Newbould's work, although it's never influenced my own work (yet. I keep all doors open). This image resonated with me because it reminded me of my own fond memories of the seaside in my own bright red swimsuit when I was little. I've always loved red. The power of the graphic designer is immense, and I find this very interesting. Since seeing this poster, I've wanted to go to Skegness, a place I'd never even thought of before. Also: the old man reminds me of Captain January, a favourite Shirley Temple film of mine.

http://collectionsonline.nmsi.ac.uk/detail.php?type=related&kv=233200&t=objects

7.Cloud study by Constable
      I find this interesting purely because I love clouds almost or maybe more than I love trees. Actually. to refine that: I love clouds MORE because I haven't conquered drawing them yet. I'm pretty happy with the method I've got for trees and I need to have one for clouds too. And i just LOVE travelling through them,  especially the pillar-like fluffy ones that make planes jump about. I love turbulence. The best experience I've ever had was on a plane over Georgia, window seat over the wing, lightning storm literally forming out of the clouds next to me. The lightning cracked the sky open and illuminated the nebula-like, densely twisted cloud formatins around it. Everyone else was screaming but I was enthralled...

http://angustrumble.blogspot.com/2009/04/constables-cloud-studies.html

8. Ben Wilson- drawing on chewing gum
     This artist lives and works very near me and I've seen him at it often in my local muswell hill/east finchly. Besides that, I think I've eaten at the cafe this is about! (They're very good) I find the concept of his work very interesting, as I would never have thought to draw on gum ever, but it really does brighten up the streets.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/picturegalleries/howaboutthat/3703065/Chewing-gum-art-on-the-streets-of-Muswell-Hill-by-Ben-Wilson.html

9. 'Marriage a la Mode' by Hogarth
     I find his insights into social behaviour both funny and relevant despite how he worked in the 18th century. This has nothing of particular relevance to me except that it's just one of my favourite paintings ever. I like art to tell a story, stories are what I'm primarily concerned with...hence my river washed me up into illustration.

 http://www.aworldtowin.net/reviews/HogarthvsGG.html

Victorian memento mori

 

 

I find this photo very interesting and terribly sad, as well as peculiar - on the one hand it's a little ghastly, yet on the other it's a poignant rminder of a little girl who was so obviously loved. (Did i mention she's dead?) The idea of photgraphing one's dead relative is one that has been (thankfully) lost over time. The ease of photography we all enjoy today makes it easy to capture a person whilst living, happy memories recorded while they happen. But in the Victorian times when daguerrotypes were brand new, often the only photo a family of a dead loved one (especially a child, given the high rate of infant mortality) had would ahve been taken post mortem.
    i suppose it's just another way of remembering and coping with loss, thinngs which we all have to deal with. To them it wasn't as odd and macabre as it seems to us, it was an expression of loving memory (especially in the above image- you can just imagine the little girls's parents arranging her favourite dolls to sleep with her for eternity :( ) as well as a reminder of one's own mortality.

Stardate unknown, somewhere south of summer...

It's me again.
I'm back, I know it's been a while.
I'm hoping to get this back up and running again; I've done significantly less than while at college of course, but I have done some interesting things I'd like to share with you.
Speak again shortly.

heres a llama theres a llama and a | llama font

heres a llama theres a llama and a llama font


amazing!!!!

The sought after review.

Fellini’s Satyricon

If one positive thing is to be said about the aberration that was ‘Satyricon’, it is that at least Fellini seems to have fulfilled his own warped criteria.

The film was based upon the then-recently discovered book ‘Satyricon’ by the Roman writer Petronius, which gives greatly degenerate versions of mildly degenerate classical myths. The film is fragmented; one cannot follow a plot or a narrative; this is a direct reflection of the nature of the book, which was only discovered in pieces. Some may say those who disliked ‘Satyricon’ were dissatisfied with the lack of narrative. No. The film ‘Slacker’ also had a complete lack of narrative structure, too, but you didn't see people walking out of that. Falling asleep, maybe, but not walking out. I actually really liked ‘Slacker’, in hindsight. Despite its catatonic delivery, it was surprising insightful. The disjointedness of the plot really worked well and created an atmosphere that was both challenging and enjoyable.
       In marked contrast, ‘Satyricon’ was offensive, crude and disgusting. And I know Fellini's 'reasons' behind it; he was portraying an entirely amoral world, but none of that mattered. I watched for the first ten minutes and I felt very much attacked and disgusted. It was a depraved and ghastly film that should be cut up into little pieces and disposed of along with waste and menstrual matter. Except that would be a dishonour to the waste and menstruation.
      ‘Satyricon’ was clearly designed to shock, albeit in a decidedly lackadaisical way. But there are better ways to shock an audience. The painting ‘The Death of David Kelly’ by Dexter Dalwood is gently shocking through its bold colours, collage-like style and the understated title. Things that are too ‘in-your-face’ are often not well received. I suppose the thing to consider is whether you prefer being cleverly quiet, or brashly memorable.
       Fans of the noxious film will tell me 'that was the intention'. But I firmly believe that filmmakers, artists and designers have a great responsibility. I was reading snippets of the Thomist philosopher Jacques Maritain, who believes that ‘Art by itself tends to the good of the work, not to the good of man.’ That definition would justify a lot of art in all forms; it is definitely true. Nobody considers the wider implications of the work, only that the work be good and acceptable in the eyes of the artist and the arty minority. Maritain also believes artists are the ones who (and this may be especially true in today’s anti-religious climate) provide mankind with food for the spirit, important things which affect the inner person, whether or not we want to pretend it does not. I say, in a world where perversion is generally shunned, why does the art community seek specifically to teach and indoctrinate us in perverse things, and why is perversion celebrated?  Indeed, during a search on the web I found that ‘Satyricon’ received standing ovations and positive reviews worldwide.
 
Perhaps we should all watch Fellini’s ‘masterpiece’ intently; it shows us a way of life that should never be sought after. Perhaps it will enrich our lives... But I doubt it. Rather, I can truly say I’ve learned firsthand the meaning of the phrase ‘clinical shock.’ My brain has only just stopped crying and shuddering in pain.



(References:

: http://www.nathanielturner.com/responsibilityoftheartist.htm  (Maritain quote) 

   http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20010727/REVIEWS/107270302/1023 (Roger Ebert’s review)

Turner Prize 2010, ‘The Death of David Kelly’, Dexter Dalwood room, Tate Britain)

The Films. Part Two.

Please first read Part One.

Now.

One of the things the tutors consistently emphasise is the idea that cinema is meant to do more than entertain; that a film can be important, so one must watch it even if one finds it disagreeable to the very soul.

I'd like to challenge that.

What, I wonder, was the first point, if you like, of film? Its original raison d'etre.

The first movie ever to have been made is thought by many to be 'Roundhay Garden Scene' in 1888, in which a bunch of late 19th century-ers sit around laughing in a garden in England.What was the point? Of course, it could have simply been Because. Because it was possible, and why not. Moving on from that, it's fair to say that movies of all sorts were made
     * to entertain
     *to inform
or possibly both.
   Good  examples of such would be the silent films we were treated to last week at the Odeon. Buster Keaton's lighthearted antics were a good example of the medium of early cinema being used to entertain and raise a laugh back in 1924, and although the slapstick and obvious humour is slighjtly out of fashion to most today, silent films still make us laugh, and are entertaining through the sheer jollity of them.
    In contrast, Man With A Movie Camera was not made purely to entertain or make us laugh, it was likely propaganda showing the happiness (debatable) of the Soviet people under Stalin, at that time a relatively new leader. It was enjoyable because it was so interesting.
    Moving very quickly through history, it's clear that the movies which did best in any genre at any time, were movies designed to entertain the audience. Obviously at some point, other forces started realising cinema was  a good way of reaching the masses and thus the concept of film being 'important' arose.
     In some cases, films can be important. I would say that generally anything of a historical nature is a very important film, because it is very important for everyone to know history well, and if they're in positions of even very little power, learn from it. I do Not think that the genre of 'important film' should extend to films designed purposefully to shock, offend, antagonise or pervert.

     Of course, this is a big topic; it touches on all kinds of moral issues such as whether films should be censored, and that sounds atrociously Holocaustic. But I do think that some kind of discretion should be used as to what is and is not appropriate. Films that are mentally damaging should not be allowed to enter production, let alone be seen by masses of people. I'm constantly thinking about that. It's quite worrying, when one does think about that, that anyone, perhaps of a damaged or questionable nature can go easily and see films like Saw or Se7en, or Fellini's Satyricon. Perhaps, well, certainly A Clockwork Orange can be put into that list as well. It seems people in important postions within the film industry- the writers, producers and directors etc, never heed the warnings that such depraved content can affect people in adverse ways and give the most dangerous ones in society not just ideas, but a little 'how-to' pack.
     In a way, the public are being given the old 'carrot-&-stick'. On the one hand, logical sources such as the News, journals and countless reports of professionals, officials and journalists teach society that basically wrong things are wrong. The stories we hear about through the media (and the ones we don't) of murder,  horror, evil and various kinds of sexual perversion are abominable and highly distressing, which of co.urse they are.
            Then on the other hand, the other powers and personalities in this world lure common, everyday, essentially normal people to watch and be actually entertained by the same topics, dressed up in the rags of fiction, through film, though games and increasingly even through books.
       Of course, we humans and the society we live in are imperfect. Of course, these awful paradoxes are bound to happen, and bad things are inevitable.
       But I think we all have a duty, then, to make sure we are not led on to believe that such forms of entertainment are fine, fun and without consequence.

A film should not be watched simply because it is 'important' for whatever philosophical, cultural or arty reasons. Thoses concepts are interesting and important to study to an extent, of course; one must grow from the previous learnings of the past. But I think we need to not lose sight of the fact that certain boundaries are boundaries for a reason, and so should not be crossed.






Just as an endnote, I was thinking again of Satyricon...clearly humanity has progressed since the times of the amoral and hedonistic classical Greeks and Romans.

Why can't entertainment do the same?
   

Alright. The Films. Part One.

This will be the first of many, I'm sure, because I have many opinions regarding the film choices at this term's cinema screenings.

Today I'm going to make a quick point in reaction to something said by one of the tutors speaking before today's film about Fellini's Satyricon.

Lots of people walked out of that movie; I myself didn't watch, I wrote and listened to music instead. I was just about to leave when the curtain fell, so to speak, on our time slot at the cinema. I wish I had left earlier, just so I could have been one of the ones to make that point.

The tutors were apparently surprised by the reaction to the film, and also by the incredibly low turn-out the following week, which, if you ask me, was directly related to the Satyricon week.
    One said that the reason he didn't like, and the reason he thought most of us didn't like the Satyricon was the lack of narrative structure.

No.

Slacker had a complete lack of narrative structure, too, but you didn't see people walking out of that. falling asleep, maybe, but not walking out. I actuaaly really liked Slacker, in hindsight. While I was there, I found it relaxing, and many of the snippets were really interesting, even though its delivery was a little catatonic. But afterwards, I would definately enjoy seeing it again. The disjointedness of the plot really worked well and created an atmosphere that was both challenging and enjoyable.
     In marked contrast, Satyricon's lack of narractive was really not an issue with me. The film was a challenging watch, some might say, and it was definately not enjoyable. Hence I stopped watching and many walked out.
    Personally, I felt that the reason I didn't like Satyricon- wait, scratch that, HATED Satyricon was that it was offensive, crude and disgusting. And I know Fellini's 'reasons' behind it. I. Don't. Care. None of that mattered. I watched for the first ten minutes and I felt very much attacked and disgusted. It was a depraved and ghastly film that should be cut up into little pieces and disposed of along with waste and menstrual matter.

Except that would be a dishonor to the waste and menstruation.

Probably, fans of the noxious film will tell me 'that was the intention' and that 'my view clearly shows Fellini was successful'. I think filmmakers, artists and designers have a great responsibility. The human eye is a marvellous thing. Out of all our senses, sight is the fastest and most permanent way of engraving information ont the brain. Should the foul images from Satyricon (and remember, I only watched ten minutes) be engraved on our minds? They say it's an exploration of humanity and its boundaries, or of transcending those boundaries. Should such barriers be crossed? In my opinion, no. Humanity would fester and rot until we were all dead should people in reality cross such barriers. Of course, the vast majority of people aren't going to go out and directly copy the behaviour in Satyricon   (and I say that with a modicum of doubt; I have learned in my classical civilisation studies that once upon a time people actually did behave in that way), but I ask, is it worth it? Is it worth the death of humanity just to question what humanity is? We do not have to go to such offensive extremes to challenge such ideas.
    And, although I know many in my peer group may object to this, I really don't think it should have been selected to show to an audience of Foundation students. As a group, I'm sure most of us are not mature students, and even though we live in a cosmopolitan environment in 2011, we're by nature still impressionable. And I balk to think/say that, too, but I accept it as fact. Psychologically and biologically. The film should not have been shown. And today, we shouldn't have had other (I'm sure) similarly depraved and perverse  films recommended to us.
  
   In a world where perversion is generally shunned, why does the art community seek specifically to teach and indoctrinate us in perverse things, and why is perversion celebrated?

By the way, these are rhetorical questions; I feel there can be no justifiable answer by sane people.

   

After Madonna's first venture into film, with the universally slammed 'Filth and Wisdom', I remember reading in one review that cinema-goers left the cinema in a state of clinical shock. I laughed when I first read that, I hadn't heard much about the film, hadn't (and haven't)  seen it etc. And I felt quite sorry for Ms Ciccone. (Even though I'm sure she's fine, she's likely grown a very robust skin.)
       After seeing a portion of Satyricon, I now know what that critic felt like. I don't know so can't comment as to whether or not he was justified, but I know that I was disturbed after watching that. And not in any kind of arty, pretentious, 'it's-good-for-your-practice' way. In an actuallu clinically disturbing way. Afterwards, I had to go take myself to my favourite relaxing place in the city (Waterstones Piccadilly Circus) to calm my recently abused mind, soothe it, comfort it, and make it stop crying and shuddering in pain. I ended up spending £40 in there. Therapy.  I'm sure if I had watched the rest of the film, or even the rest of the bit they chose (drunkenly and blindly) to show us, I would be needing real therapy.

And rehabilitation.

images...

I had previously heard of Sara Faneeli's work, and of course, I've been one of the many who have walked through it. :) So naturally she was the first I thought of when I decided I wanted to do handwriting on my book project.        Marion Deuchars however, I discovered on that project. I actually found these exact images recently, as in, post project, and I was really surprised how well they complement my work! For example, Deuchars' handwriting is eerily like my own, and Faneeli's timeline actually looks exactly like my 'slides'- I swear I didn't see them first! Both designers use their handwriting natural talents beautifully.

been away...

...not with the fairies, unfortunately.

I've been ridiculously overwhelmed and stressed, so i haven't posted in a while. to be honest, i find it quite hard to keep this up. I love writing, and now that i'm a week into preparing for the FMP, i've been keeping a reflective journal. I ADORE it. It takes no effort!
   So sorry if i've been neglecting you, my online diary friend. Often it's just not feasible that i should waste time waiting for my unpredictable router to step up its game and give me internet. (Sometimes it's fine, but sometimes it can take about half an hour to boot up. The longest I've mucked about trying to get teh wireless to work was 2 hours forty minutes. And even then it didn't work. I gave up. You see why I don't try very
often.)

So what has happened since i last posted?

Let me put some artist stuff up first. I know i said i would.

So the 'holidays' are almost over...

And i'm not sure how i feel about that...

On the one hand, i've really not enjoyed this holiday at all because of various reasons:
       97% this book project
       2% family crisis/-ness (and no, not regarding xmas-i don't celebrate it)
       1% not really having a break.
so i'll be glad to get it over with tomorrow. It's been a real struggle, this project. I was really looking forward to it, because it was the one thing i knew wholeheartedly that i wanted to do, and i was super inspired by the presentation Wendy gave us about book art. Plus,it was a fun thing to do, it was fun to make a book, even though unfortunately none of mine are traditionally boind. But I've had so many other things on my mind....
.....i found it VERY hard to start working from being ABSOLUTELY and COMPLETELY drained from last term, the cheer comp and especially university and ucas stuff. Plus, a little family crisis happened bang in the middle of this, which REALLY disturbed me and stopped me working,
    For the first time in my whole life, i've been driven to cry and comfort eat this holiday. I've actually stretched my stomach, i think, becasue now nothing fills me up.
     i feel a little upset with myself for not being able to pull myself out of whatever funk i'm in, becasue although i've nearly fininished my books, i wonder (hell, i know) that i could've done better or more had i not been so filled with angst for the entire damned 'break.' I'm just glad i'm almost finished. I was beginning to wonder whether or not i would be...
 
So, yes, i'll be very glad to go back tomorrow and get the whole damned debacle/ shebang/ episode over with.

But on the other hand i'm sinking lower into the doldrums with the knowledge that i've got even more stress on the horizon, what with my portfolio and interviews etc. This makes me sigh and give up any hope of freedom until the summer, or more likely after my degree. I just really hope i get onto one; i hope my doldrum-ness didn't seep into my ucas application or something. I tried hard not to let it, but for some reason my statement doesn't sound as happy post-modification than it once did...hopefully that's just me externalising, rather than the statement actually being boring.
   
 All i want is to curl up in a blanket with stuffed animals and watch star trek.

Is it SO much to ask????


On the upside, i almost always feel worse about my work than it actually is. I must keep reminding myself that. Plus, i have kept a MUCH better sketchbook this time. I still haven't put much research in it yet, becasue of printing (my home printer ink has run out, i'm not going to be able to replace it now. did buy another cartridge, but it was wrong) (Also, can't quite afford to take stuff to the printer's.)  SO I SHALL POST THE RESEARCH HERE....
                                      ....because i swear, i really have done a lot of it this time. I looked at all the sheet references and did my own. But it's also very hard to prove i've looked at a website. How would one know?

Plus, the stupid animation i made still won't go up...
well, it's not stupid, i'm actually rather proud of it, but i am having real trouble sorting it out for emailing to Fiona. I've been trying for ages. Ah well, will continue working now...